Episode 46: Cultivating A Culture Of Belonging As A Leader with Wendy Gates Corbett
In a world of corporate layoffs and quiet quitting, where we are more disconnected and disengaged at work than ever before. How do we increase productivity, retention, and employee satisfaction? We create cultures of belonging.
In this episode, we talk with Wendy Gates Corbett about:
What does belonging mean?
Why it’s so important to our workplace and community
Who is responsible for building a culture of belonging
How everyone can do small things every day to create a culture of belonging
Get the book - The Energy Of Belonging: 75 Ideas To Spark Workplace Community
Websites: www.wendygatescorbett.com / www.signature-presentations.com
Book: The Energy of Belonging: 75 Ideas to Spark Workplace Community
Become a Belonging Insider (newsletter): https://wendygatescorbett.ck.page/77f7346a04
Full Transcript:
Today on the upgraded leader podcast, I'm interviewing my good friend, Wendy gates Corbett. As we talk about cultivating a culture of belonging as a leader at work. And I'm so excited to introduce you to her. Wendy stands at the forefront of belonging and leadership wielding her expertise with a vibrant energy that transforms workplaces and speaking stages alike. Her personal journey as a biracial individual has profoundly influenced her mission to cultivate spaces of unconditional acceptance. A mission that she brings to life as a top tier organizational cultural consultant, global training, executive belonging researcher, and adjunct professor of leadership and management and all of duke university's graduate engineering programs, Wendy's research, which has touched over 150,000 people worldwide pinpoints the behaviors that foster a genuine sense of belonging within organizations. Wendy's new book.
[00:00:48] The energy of belonging is a continuation of her vital discourse on the subject, whether consulting in the boardroom lecturing in the classroom, or captivating an audience on stage. When he gates corporate is a beacon of progress, hope and action, guiding a path toward a more inclusive, empowered, and thriving future.
[00:01:03] her work sparks, impactful change, encouraging everyone to claim their space, their voice, and their power to create spaces where belonging thrives. I cannot wait for you to listen to this interview. We had so much fun. There's so much packed into this. Let's dive into that interview.
[00:01:18] Nicole: Welcome back to the upgraded leader podcast, where we talk about all things, managing up, building relationships, leading our teams, personal brands, setting goals and setting boundaries. And of course, succeeding in our careers on our terms. I'm your host Nicole case. And today I am joined by my friend, Wendy Gates Corbett, who is an expert in a lot of things.
[00:01:37] But specifically today, we are going to talk about creating a culture of belonging at work. And if you are a leader in your organization, you know, how. Important. This is, but also how tricky it can feel. So that's why I asked Wendy to come on and just have a conversation about this. Um, so Wendy, thanks for joining me today.
[00:02:00] Wendy: You're welcome, Nicole. I am so happy to be here with
[00:02:02] Nicole: you. I feel like this has been like, this conversation has just been like such a long time coming. Yeah, so Wendy and I first met good grief. When was that? 2016, 2017. Yeah. It's been, it's been a while, it's been a hot minute and we met at, um, at another women's event where Wendy was speaking.
[00:02:27] And the, the funny thing is you were speaking on a completely different topic at that time. And I remember coming up to you afterwards and talking to you afterwards. Um, about your topic and everything. And then you actually shared with me that night that you're like, actually, I'm kind of shifting gears to this belonging thing.
[00:02:44] I'm like, Oh, cool. So, so yeah. So your career just in general has just been so varied, which I love. So like you've worked in technology companies, you've done professional speaking, you do, you've done slide design and now you're re you're doing researching and belonging. So like, help me. Connect all the dots here.
[00:03:06] Like, what's the common thread amongst, like, all of these really cool things you've done in your
[00:03:09] Wendy: career? There are dots kind of all over the place, um, but they do all connect. When, when you ask that question, as, as we were preparing for today, It got me thinking about what are the, the dot, what is the common thread among them?
[00:03:26] And the common thread is that I want to help people feel great about the time they spend at work. Um, and so part of that was in my corporate career as a training director, I was helping employees build their skills. Then I transitioned into presentation, consulting and presentation design because I was helping leaders present themselves, feel better about their ability to lead and present with confidence, have executive presence.
[00:03:57] So they could feel comfortable in their shoes and then I've transitioned to, um, as part of my professional speaking, I started speaking about my personal experience with belonging, growing up, always worried that I didn't belong. Um, and as I started speaking about that, I would have. People in the audience come to me and say, oh, my gosh, that really resonated with me.
[00:04:21] Would you come talk to my organization about that? So I actually started my, um, my exploration of belonging from a personal perspective. What can we do when we find ourselves in situations where we feel like we don't belong or we question whether we do? As I learned more about what we can do, I started, um, what I, my typical learning path is as I start learning something, I get to the point where I want to share this with others.
[00:04:53] Oh, my gosh, Nicole, you're going to think this is so cool and. So that's what I started doing. Um, and I also started looking at what we can do, not just for ourselves, but for our workplace BFFs and our buddies who we can see feel disconnected from, you know, from their workplace, um, that I sort of had an aha moment, like, um.
[00:05:19] I have a master's in organizational psychology that might be helpful with me spreading my message about what we can do to build a culture of belonging. So those are how the dots connect. The common thread is I want you to feel good about the time you spend on this earth. And because at least in the U.
[00:05:39] S. we spend at least a third of our life at work. I want you to feel good about the time you spend at work.
[00:05:46] Nicole: Yeah. I love that. And I would say I so resonate with that because that's also a similar reason why I do the work that I do and why I worked in, in corporate HR for a long time. Like I wanted to help.
[00:05:57] People make work suck less, right? And, um, and, and I know that like, if I think back on my experience and in the workplace, like when I felt my most confident felt like I was making the biggest impact alongside of that, I had. I felt like I belonged. I felt like I was making an impact. Like I had the people around me that supported me in that and supported me in my own growth, which is, um, is important to me.
[00:06:26] And I had just friends. I just had, I had friends at work and I can see in experiences where I did not have that and had just how different it felt and how, um. I know I wasn't able to perform at my, at my highest. So before, before we get too, too, too far ahead of us, what exactly is belonging? Like, how would you define it?
[00:06:48] What is it? Why should we, why should we care? It is
[00:06:53] Wendy: a loaded question. What's the definition of belonging? Because as, as I started to focus on, um, what we can do to build a culture of belonging in workplaces, I started devouring everything I could get my hands on that, that touches, what is it that creates a culture of belonging?
[00:07:13] And there's a lot of stuff that's out there. And the answer is, yeah. There's a lot that contributes to a sense of belonging. And every article, every video, every blog post I read had its own definition of belonging. And I felt like there was something missing from each of those definitions. So I came up with my own.
[00:07:33] My definition of belonging is that it's an outcome. It is an outcome. It's what happens when we feel welcomed. When we feel accepted in our wrinkled, dirty t shirts without makeup, um, on a bad day, we feel welcomed. We feel, um, that what we bring to a situation is appreciated and is recognized. And we feel safe to be all of who we are.
[00:08:06] When we are part of something that is meaningful to us, that is larger than just ourselves. So that's it. And it's a, it's an, it's an emotion and an outcome of what happens when we feel connected, respected, and protected.
[00:08:22] Nicole: I love that. I love, I love that you start by it's, it's an emotion, but it's also an outcome, which means that it doesn't happen by accident.
[00:08:32] And it means that we. There are steps to take and there are actions for us to engage in, in order to have this emotional outcome happen on a regular basis for everyone as well, for everyone, not just, you know, a few, a few of the favorite folks. So with that, if this, if this is actions that we need to take, who's the we, who is responsible for creating that sense of belonging
[00:09:03] Wendy: at work?
[00:09:04] I love that question because. Oftentimes, the first answer is It's not me. I don't have the power. I don't have the authority. I don't have the budget. And I'm here to say that's not true. We are all responsible for contributing to the sense of belonging that we want in our organizations. And in fact, what I what I found as I stepped into this space is that belonging is 1 of those things.
[00:09:35] That's that's heady. It's we think it's a construct. It's vague. It's nebulous. And so I set out to to discover. What behaviors, what actions, what can I see and do that contributes to a sense of belonging? And as I started answering that question, I assumed that somebody else had already answered that. I assumed that the answers were out there.
[00:10:00] I just, like I was looking to find them and what I found is that there were resources for HR professionals. There were resources for the C suite. I could see policies and processes and initiatives, but I didn't see behaviors. What I wanted is what can I see and do to contribute to helping people feel connected, respected and protected.
[00:10:27] Because I couldn't find that answer. I started researching the answer to that question. So I created a survey, an open ended survey that app that solicits from others. What behaviors, what's 1 thing that the people you work with do that that demonstrate that they're interested in you, or that demonstrate that they respect your contributions?
[00:10:51] Um, and so what I found is that we often think. I don't have the budget. I don't have the authority. I don't have the influence. But my research shows that it is simple behaviors that, that contribute to helping us feel like we belong. So we think it's super complicated, but it's not. It is as simple as you knowing that I took my cat to the vet this morning.
[00:11:18] Even if you're allergic to cats, you don't like cats. You send me a text and say, I hope all went well at the vet because you care about me. You remembered and you, you know, we all know how to text. We all know how to send an emoji and that doesn't rely on time, budget or official organizational responsibility.
[00:11:42] Yeah, we're all responsible for contributing to, and we're all able to contribute to a sense of belonging in our workplaces.
[00:11:50] Nicole: Yeah, I love that. And I 100 percent agree. A lot of times whenever we talk about these topics, um, or we ask that question, who's responsible for creating a diverse workforce, for creating a safe, a psychologically safe workforce.
[00:12:04] Like when we ask all these questions, a lot of times the two, the two answers that we get are as well, it's HR's responsibility, which the answer is no to that first off. And, or the, the other response you usually get is like, well, it's this, it's the CEO and it's a C suite and, and. While I definitely agree with that, that there is some element that the senior leaders need to walk the walk, the senior leaders set the tone, you know, but it's, it's the, the day to day interactions that are actually creating what a culture looks like.
[00:12:36] Like you said, like, it's, it's, it's that, it's that every day. That, that people go walk away from one. Um, one interaction with an individual that that really, that really creates what their day to day looks like. They might not ever even talk or see or meet the CEO ever. Um, so I, so I totally agree that it is, it is up to all of us.
[00:13:01] No matter what level you're at, no matter what experience you have, no matter what. Influence you think, or you, you don't think you have, because I think sometimes whenever we're like, we're passing the buck, we're like, Oh, that's HR's job. Or that's a C suites job. Or that's my manager's job. Or that's, that's somebody else's job.
[00:13:17] Like that's just past, that's just passing the responsibility off on someone else. Um, which. A is unfair and B, like you have way more, you have way more influence to somebody's day to day experience than what you actually realize. Last week I was doing a, um, uh, leadership training with a company and it was on performance reviews, like how to, um, have effective performance reviews, how to, you know, um, you know, rate people.
[00:13:51] Um, accurately and without by, you know, how can we remove bias from that process and how do we also give just really high quality feedback? And it was funny. We got to this section around. We talked about, like, whenever you're rating somebody. Um, where are you rating somebody on their results? Or are you rating somebody on their behaviors?
[00:14:09] And so we had this whole conversation around, well, it's both. And there was this one leader who was just really digging in their heels about, well, you know, I can't, I can't have somebody making mistakes all over the place if they're not doing the job. And I'm like, Totally hear you. I'm not suggesting that you hire or continue to employ people that are like truly not capable of doing, doing the job.
[00:14:29] However, if you've got two people standing side by side who have this, you have the same skill level and one's an asshole and one's an absolute delight. Which one are you going to pick? Right. And just, and we can all just remember, I'm sure we all have experiences or can think back to a time where there was somebody on your team that was like a really great top performer, but was a jerk.
[00:14:51] and how that impacted the morale and the energy
[00:14:56] Wendy: of the team. Yeah, so I, I am not saying that leaders are not responsible, but they are not the only ones responsible. So I'm not letting leaders in the C suite off the hook in terms of creating a sense of a culture of belonging. But it's not just their responsibility.
[00:15:16] It is all of our responsibility. Definitely. And it's possible. Yeah. It's something we can all do.
[00:15:22] Nicole: So, what are some tactical things? Because again, sometimes this can feel really squishy. It can feel really fluffy and woo woo. What are some tactical things that we can do, both as leaders, because, um, because I do think it's, it's important for us as leaders to like, be like, listen, I want to be looking out for this.
[00:15:39] I want to make sure that I'm, I'm doing what I can as a leader. Um, but also just for everyone, anyone listening, what can we be doing to ensure that our employees and our colleagues feel that sense of belonging at work?
[00:15:51] Wendy: Well, the first thing they can do is ask. Um, the, really the foundation of the research that I'm, I'm doing is open ended surveys that are asking the question, what is one thing that your colleagues or your leaders do that help you feel connected?
[00:16:08] Um, and so asking that question, either having a discussion, Or having a, um, distributing a survey that asks, what is it that, that makes you feel comfortable? So, one of the things I, I find really interesting is that I, so far I have over 2, 000 responses to the survey and there, there are broad ranges. Of course, there are broad ranges of responses, but the number 1 response to the survey prompt, I feel connected to my colleagues and leaders when.
[00:16:39] Is when we talk about non work topics. Hmm, so that doesn't mean a half day off site retreat. That doesn't mean an hour or 2 hour lunches. That doesn't mean another meeting on our calendars. It can be as simple as adding 3 minutes or or designating the 1st, 3 minutes of a meeting where you talk about something.
[00:17:05] That's not work related and it doesn't have to be everyone, but simply opening a space for, um, for people to share a recent funny event that happened or a highlight of their week. Um, you know, to, to show that I care about you as a human being, um, beyond our workplace. So that's one thing that people can do is to make just a little bit of time to talk about non work topics.
[00:17:32] Yeah. In terms of demonstrating respect. Uh, when I, when I go into organizations, I work with, uh, program participants to identify if these are the behaviors that my colleagues say help us feel connected, respected and protected, which one of these resonates with me and what can I do to bring that about?
[00:17:53] So, for example, recently, I worked with a group of leaders and 1 of the survey responses was, I feel connected to my leader when she comes to speak with me in person. Instead of sending me an email now, obviously, this is an organization where they are co located. Um, but but the leader saw that response and said, I am committing to speaking to people to my colleagues.
[00:18:21] In person, I'm committing to doing that once a day. All right, that's not huge. And it's doable. So that's 1 thing you can do to demonstrate that you respect them is to go to their space, take time, take the steps, literally the steps to go see them to have a conversation in person. And then to help us feel protected or to contribute to, um, we feel protected.
[00:18:49] That's the whole psychological safety aspect of, um, of our work environments and that's acknowledging that we are all vulnerable. Um, what leaders can do is is model transparency and vulnerability by being willing to be vulnerable. Now, I don't mean, like, opening up their heart with it, sharing a deep, dark secret, but something as simple as.
[00:19:13] Acknowledging a mistake that they made, like forgetting to attach the attachment in an email, you know, and sharing either a lesson they've learned or a question they struggled to answer does not have to be huge, but demonstrating vulnerability models that it's okay to be vulnerable. Those are some tactics.
[00:19:37] I love that.
[00:19:38] Nicole: Um, first of all, I love all of those things, but what you also just described were a bunch of very simple, not huge time stuff, you know, doesn't take a whole lot of time and free, free things. We don't need to have a budget to create
[00:19:54] Wendy: belonging. No, you don't need an initiative. Yeah, no,
[00:19:58] Nicole: no, we do not
[00:20:00] Wendy: need another initiative.
[00:20:01] Not that they're bad, but I'm saying it's, it's not. Limited to or restricted to does not require an initiative to build it. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:20:12] Nicole: I love that. And also to again, like, if we, if we pull it back to, we're all responsible for this. What this means is, is that we don't need our bosses permission to do this.
[00:20:21] We don't need again. We don't need permission to do this. This is just being conscious. Of the people who are working around us and recognizing that they're human beings just like us and they have needs and everyone just wants to be seen, heard and understood. Right. Exactly. Everyone wants that. I don't care.
[00:20:38] Again, I don't care what generation that you come from. I don't care what your, what, what industry you're working in. Everyone wants to be seen, heard, and understood. And this is one of the ways that we, we can do that. So you've been researching this. For a while now, and I will say, I, I loved actually, I know you, you had a lot of ways that you got, you got your survey results and all that.
[00:21:02] One of the ways I thought was super cool, by the way, which is genius last year, Wendy and I were, um, speaking at, uh, the same women in tech event and. Part of Wendy's talk was like, yeah, let's talk about this. Let's gather the data while I'm here, while I'm here. Why not? And I thought, first of all, I thought that was genius.
[00:21:19] But secondly, what I, what I loved about all this is that your, the research that you have done has been rooted in just reality day to day talking to people. This wasn't you off in some lab somewhere theorizing about any of this. This is talking to real people. And. You've done us all a great favor by wrapping it all up in a nice, pretty bow.
[00:21:41] So tell us about the book that is
[00:21:45] Wendy: already out and available. You have totally made my day. So yes, it is all wrapped up in a beautiful purple bow. Of course. So the, the book is The Energy of Belonging. And I chose that, that title because So many of us can relate to that energy, that positive energy that is, um, that comes together when we feel connected, respected and protected.
[00:22:11] Just the, um, there's, there's research that shows that, um, when there's a stronger sense of belonging, those organizations are more innovative, they are more productive, they are more profitable. And their employees stay longer. Their employees are more productive. They're more collaborative. Um, so I, the, the book shares a little bit of, of that, um, statistical, um, information for people who want it, but there are three major sections of the book connected, respect, connect, respect, and protect.
[00:22:47] Um, and it share each section shares some of the, the. Common research found findings. I discovered and then 25 ideas that you can use to connect with the people around you. Um, and so my hope is that you can see at least 1 idea that you're like, oh, I can do that and I can do that tomorrow. Or heck, I could do it right now.
[00:23:12] And I also hope. That you riff on them, take them and be like, Ooh, we could do a little bit of this. We could twist it and do it this way. It's great. I want you to see that, that the, the behaviors that build belonging that build connection, respect, and a sense of psychological safety are doable. And that's what you'll see in the book.
[00:23:36] Nicole: Yeah, I love, yeah, I love that. This book is such, the research is there, which I love, but it's not a textbook. It's not like heavy in that way and it's so practical. So again, if you. Anybody should be grabbing this book and we'll put links to it where you can find it in the show notes so you don't have to worry about hunting around for it.
[00:24:00] Um, but the fact that you like did all of this research for years and then pulled it all together in a book, like anything, was there any surprises or anything that like stood out to you throughout this process of just kind of like pulling, you know, your best, your best work together into, into this, into this
[00:24:18] Wendy: book?
[00:24:19] What I love about it is that, um, the survey responses come from all over the world. People in different industries at different levels of their careers and different professions. And what I love is at the same time, there is. Some universality in regardless of our role, what, what people need, what people want in their workplaces is to be seen, heard and valued, you know, and safe to be their imperfect selves.
[00:24:54] And so I love how the most common response to I feel connected is when we talk about non work topics, you know, that is true across the board. I also love when, when I go into organizations, or when I speak at a conference, as you mentioned, I love sharing here are some of the common results from my research.
[00:25:18] And then here are some of the interesting results. Um, from, from this audience and I love sharing how there's so much overlap and, and universality. And I also love pointing out some of the uniquenesses that exist in this, in this specific environment. Because people can see, they, they realize that it's not just them that wants to be seen, heard, and valued.
[00:25:44] It's everyone.
[00:25:46] Nicole: Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. So if I'm a leader. Or again, just anybody, anybody at work and like, what would be the best way to kind of work through this, work through this material and, and bring other people along with me?
[00:26:02] Wendy: Well, 1, my 1st thought is that, uh, read the connect section. 1st, um, the, my framework, the energy of belonging and feeling connected, respected and protected is not linear.
[00:26:15] You can dive into any of those that resonate with you. Um, but I would say, if nothing else, jump to the 25 ideas in the connect section and and think about, um, 1 way, you might do 1 of those behaviors with someone else, you know, whether it's, um, inviting someone you don't know. To, um, to go for a walk around your, your office, or even if you're not co located, um, you know, go on a 15 minute walk while you're talking on the phone with this person.
[00:26:47] Um, so there are, there are a bunch of different ideas from different perspectives from 1 on 1. Some are in person, some are virtual, some are asynchronous choose 1 behavior that involves someone else. And try it. I love
[00:27:02] Nicole: that. I love that. Um, tell us about the resources. Tell us about where we can find more information about you and just about, about all things, the energy of belonging.
[00:27:16] Wendy: So, um, you can check out wendygatescorbett. com, um, has a, uh, a lot of my resources and the programs that I offer related to belonging. There's a link to, to the book. Um, in the book, there is, um, at the end of each 25. Set each set of 25 ideas. Um, there's a website where you can go to download a PDF of those 25 ideas So download those and choose one share share them with your your colleagues or your leaders Um so that you can you know, you can start putting them to use You can get the book on amazon new york There's also a link to it, um, at my LinkedIn profile and, uh, wendygatescorbett.
[00:28:01] com.
[00:28:02] Nicole: Yeah. And again, we will put all of those links in the show notes so that you all, everyone can go out there and easily, easily grab them. I'd love to see listeners out here creating little book clubs around this, walking through these, um, resources together at work. Again, go grab yourself the book and, and get moving, get moving on all of this.
[00:28:22] And I would also say that I'm sure there's a lot of things that we're already doing naturally. in here as well. So for those of you who are, are already kind of have this like innate sense of wanting to include people, you're probably already well on your way. And so maybe this is an opportunity to continue to be that beacon in your
[00:28:41] Wendy: organization.
[00:28:42] Yeah, I wanted you reminded me, Nicole, that, um, that 1 of the things we're offering is a book club starter kit that includes 3 or more books, depending on the size of your book club. So it includes several books. It includes the PDFs. Of the downloads, it includes starter discussion questions for your book club.
[00:29:06] So stuff you can use materials you can use to get started exploring belonging in your organization, or even wherever you are. It doesn't have to be within your organization.
[00:29:17] Nicole: Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. Because belonging happens. Out in our communities as well. Yeah. Awesome. Well, Wendy, thank you so much for coming on and sharing all of this amazing information and sharing more about your book.
[00:29:31] Just it's just been so delightful to have you on today. I
[00:29:34] Wendy: am so glad that you invited me. Thank you so much. All
[00:29:37] Nicole: right.
[00:29:38] Wendy: Thanks, Wendy.
